NEIGH-borhood Tales: I Quit!
I’ve had plenty of training and more show experience than everyone else in the NEIGH-borhood. I haven’t forgotten a thing I’ve been taught, but like any athlete, I can get out of shape, mentally and physically. Although people can train to become accomplished gymnasts and dancers, Mother Nature didn’t really intend for them to spend their days flinging themselves around parallel bars or prancing around in toe shoes. Without constant practice, they’d quickly lose these skills.
Although many people think horses want to be ridden, they are mistaken. A wild horse never looks at a person and thinks, “Hey, come on over and hop on! Carrying around an extra 150 pounds or so will make my back feel deee-lightful and shoving a metal bar in my mouth would be the icing on the cake!” No, people came up with that idea. When they saw us zipping around, they thought, “Hmmmm, walking is really tiring and boy, oh boy, wouldn’t it be fun to go as fast as that animal. My, my, wouldn’t that back make a perfect seat!”
On a scale of 1-10, 1 being “Don’t even think of hopping on” and 10 being “Hey, drop what you’re doing and let’s boogie on out of here”, I’d give myself a 2. Trinity is a 10 and Beau is a -1. Sonny and Cherokee don’t count; they’re so docile, they never question a person’s right to saddle up.
I’ve been to a slew of different barns. Some places have fed me really well and handled me properly. Others have been skimpy with the hay and short on praise. One barn was run by someone who believed that crystals, herbal potions, and psychics would help horses perform well. I didn’t feel any mystical energies emanating from the giant rose quartz crystal placed outside my stall, but it was definitely more decorative than a ratty old horse blanket.
I was really peeved the last time Mom dropped me off at a barn. (It wasn’t the crystal palace.) I kept rearing up and down in my stall just to let everyone know that I was not in a cooperative mood. Unfortunately, that didn’t deter them from putting me back into a work program. I was hanging out in one of the large paddocks the following morning when I saw Mom walking down the path. She waved and called, “Hey Plats! How’s my good boy?”
I thought, “How’s your good boy? If I’m such a good boy, why the heck did you send me to boot camp?” I turned my butt to her, walked away, and hid behind a tree.
Mom said, “Silly Plats, I see you. You’re way too big to hide behind that skinny tree. Come on over and give Mommy a kiss.”
“Ha! Go home and get a kiss from Trinity or Sonny,” I thought, and refused to come to her, forcing her to walk across the field to get me.
As she hooked the lead onto my halter she said, “I know you don’t want to be here but it’s naughty behavior like this that led you here in the first place. And don’t think I’ve forgotten about your “spooking” at home. You and I both know you weren’t afraid when you leaped sideways and dumped me on the ground. You were just hoping I’d stop riding you. The sooner you brush up on your skills and your manners, the sooner you’ll return to the NEIGH-borhood.”
Sigh … Foiled again!
Like millions of youngsters, Nancy Di Fabbio was infatuated with horses and never gave up dreaming that one day she’d be riding one of her own. She eventually realized her dreams and got her first horse, followed quickly by her second, third, fourth and finally fifth. Passionate about sharing her love for this amazing animal, she’s written Saddle Up! – And Live Your Dream, a comprehensive how-to for the budding equestrian which will be released this fall. She also writes a children’s column about the exploits of her herd, but the stories are informative, funny and touching enough to appeal to everyone. You can share their adventures on TheExaminerNews.com website under the heading: NEIGH-borhood Tales
Adam has worked in the local news industry for the past two decades in Westchester County and the broader Hudson Valley. Read more from Adam’s author bio here.
