Getting The Organizationally-Challenged Student Ready for College

Aug 14, 2013 Examiner Media Parenting Pep Talk

It’s the time of year when parents are scrambling to get their kids ready for their first year of college. Numerous trips to Target, Bed Bath & Beyond, The Container Store, etc. help to ensure that your children have what they need to live on their own, away from the familiar and predictable life they live at home. While this kind of support is indeed necessary, many children, particularly those with ADHD and related conditions, require another kind of support. They need to have a supportive social network in place. There are a number of independent living skills that college kids need in order to succeed. It’s important for parents to help their children understand their own strengths and weaknesses and to develop strategies and coping mechanisms. They need to know exactly where to go when they need help.

College kids are responsible for managing sleep and waking up in the morning. They need to keep track of clothing and do laundry regularly. They may need to manage their own medications. Money and budgeting can become an issue. Scheduling can also be quite challenging for the student with organizational and time-management inadequacies. They not only need to make it to class, they must schedule study time and plan long-term assignments.

Throughout high school, parents likely helped their children structure their routines. They were available to check in and make sure their kids did what needed to get done. College changes this structure and children must take charge. Parents can be consulted but they aren’t capable of overseeing everything. Students with ADHD, autism spectrum disorders, etc. will often need a structure to be in place before beginning the school year, and there are many resources available to help make the transition from home to college a smooth one.

If you suspect that your child will struggle with independent living skills or with managing assignments and time, contact the Student Disability Office before classes begin to request accommodations (e.g., alternate test-taking locations), tutors, and/or study buddies. The college counseling center provides low-cost psychotherapy (sometimes even free). If your child allows, you can check in with these professionals throughout the year to track progress or at least to confirm that appointments are kept. You can also send any diagnostic or testing reports beforehand so that the professionals develop an understanding about your child’s unique pattern of functioning. If you are worried about medication maintenance, you can contact the school’s infirmary. The counseling center might also advise your child to speak with their professors candidly about any challenges they anticipate having.

These supports are meant to ensure your child does not become overwhelmed with the increased demands of college life, and then fail. Unfortunately, many intelligent and capable children return home after their freshman year because they could not manage their time and school requirements, regardless of their academic ability. I’ve been contacted by many frustrated and confused parents who can’t understand why their child, gifted in high school, just can’t hack it in college. Typically these children struggle because they were not prepared for the demands and challenges they faced. It’s hard on parents and also on the student who comes home feeling dejected and anxious about his future. Thankfully I have witnessed and have heard countless stories about students succeeding once the proper supports are in place. Support services can easily be reduced or removed once deemed unnecessary. It’s more difficult for the struggling student to seek them out and put them in place when she is overwhelmed and drowning in self-doubt.

Dr. Jaime Black is a licensed psychologist practicing in Westchester and New York City. In addition to providing general mental health services, Jaime works with individuals of all ages on the autism spectrum, doing psychotherapy, conducting evaluations, and facilitating social skills groups. Visit www.spectrumservicesnyc.com, e-mail JaimeBlackPsyD@gmail.com or call (914)712-8208.