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Back-To-School Season: A Reminder to Support Parents’ Mental Health

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By Marie Boster

It’s back-to-school season, a time when families are rushing to buy school supplies, organize schedules and settle into new routines. Westchester County is known for its great schools and family-friendly environment, which is why my family – and just about every other recent Westchester resident I know – moved here.

With over 200,000 kids living in Westchester, the market for family services is vast – dance classes, tutoring centers, swimming pools, you name it. But amid all these resources, we often overlook what truly matters most: the mental health and well-being of the parents raising these children.

As U.S. Surgeon General Dr. Vivek Murthy recently warned, we are facing a growing mental health crisis among parents, and there is a lot that we can all do to step up to address it. In his very thoughtful advisory, Murthy pointed to alarming levels of stress. According to the report, 41 percent of parents say that most days they are so stressed they cannot function and 48 percent say that most days their stress is completely overwhelming – double the rates of non-parents.

This is a serious issue. The report highlights stressors parents face today: economic strain, time demands, worries about children’s health and safety, feelings of isolation and loneliness, pressures from technology and social media, cultural expectations and worries about their children’s future. If you’re a parent, I’m sure they all resonate.

So what do we do about it? The surgeon general’s report has many recommendations for different sectors and focused on five priorities for communities, community organizations and local schools:

  • Foster open dialogue about parental stress, mental health and well-being in culturally appropriate ways.
  • Equip parents and caregivers with resources to address parental stressors and connect to crucial support services.
  • Create opportunities to cultivate supportive social connections among parents and caregivers.
  • Elevate the voices of parents and caregivers to shape community programs and investments.
  • Strengthen and establish school-based support programs.

These are all crucial steps, but I believe there are actions that are even more fundamental, which I have too often found missing: be kind, be inclusive and support one another.

As a mother of two young children, I go out of my way to remind other parents that my husband and I are available for pick-ups and playdates if they need some time to themselves. The response is often, “That’s so sweet,” or “You’re so nice.” But for me, this is simply how I believe communities should function. Offering support to other parents isn’t about being nice, it’s about recognizing that parenting is hard work and no one should have to do it alone.

In my household, we prioritize informal gatherings with friends, even if the house isn’t spotless, the food is thrown together and the kids are running wild. It’s not about perfection; it’s about fostering community. A messy house or a casual meal shouldn’t matter. What matters is creating spaces where parents can relax, laugh and recharge together. If we start judging each other on trivial things like cleanliness or presentation, we miss the bigger picture. That’s not inclusive, and it’s certainly not supportive.

While I fully support all of the surgeon general’s recommendations and hope they’re implemented nationwide, we don’t have to wait for policy changes to make a difference. We can start now, right here in our own communities, by being the change we want to see. Simple acts of kindness and support can make a real difference in the lives of parents who are struggling with the daily challenges of raising children.

And let’s not forget, when we support parents, we’re also supporting their children. The mental well-being of parents directly impacts the well-being of their kids. By fostering an environment of support and inclusivity, we can create healthier, happier communities for all families.

This school year, let’s make a commitment to lift each other up. Whether through a simple offer to help, organizing a playdate or just lending a listening ear, these small gestures can make a big difference in the overwhelming life of a parent. Together, we can create a culture of support that benefits us all.

Marie Boster lives in northern Westchester with her husband and is a parent to a three-year-old and a five-year-old.

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